Ahhhh birthdays.. the first couple of these are so exciting you literally find yourself counting down the days until that magical 24 hours where you are queen for a day.. no chores, a pretty new dress, a fabulous shin-dig at your place – complete with themed cake and party games, presents galore and nobody can be mean to you because it’s your birthday.
Who wouldn’t look forward to that?
Sadly the more of these magical days we have under our belt.. the more the sparkle seems to fade.. the glitter rubs off.. the fairy lights sputter & die, and the more people seem to forget that it’s YOUR SPECIAL DAY.
As an adult you’re conditioned to think that certain milestones bring particular accomplishments “oh I’m 18, I’m totally independent and adult now” …”wow, 21… I know myself so much better, and I’m so mature and in tune with what I want“… “Holy smokes! 25! Quarter century… I definitely
need to have my shit together now” …and so on.. Until we reach that glorious milestone of the big three-o.
Duh duh duuuuuuh!
Surely by 30 years old, we have miraculously become the all-seeing, all-knowing goddess of wisdom, our career is thriving, our love life the envy of mere mortals, our friendships deep and fulfilling… surely by the time that clock strikes midnight, and we tick into OUR THIRTIES we’ll have all this stuff nailed, right? ….right?
If only it were that simple… if only we could magically acquire wisdom, knowledge, grace and poise simply by accomplishing the feat of making it to another birthday…. but the plain truth is that this stuff doesn’t come easy.. it’s the sum total of the living and the learning that we experience, and how we choose to process and proceed with that, which builds the person we are.
So as I head into another birthday, I’m quietly contemplating the ‘ageing process’, growing old disgracefully, milestones, the learning and the living that I have done up till now… and making some choices about the person I am choosing to be. (One of my favourite quotes being “life is not about finding yourself, life is about creating yourself”) and I would add to that: life is also about learning to love yourself.
It’s about appreciating the journey that lead you to today, and remembering that you are special all the time.. not just on that one day a year that you stop to think about it.
So for my birthday this year I plan on the pretty frock, no chores, and doing something that makes me feel like queen for the day… I shall walk around with a smile for a crown an proudly exclaim to all who will listen “it’s my birthday today!”